How do we know that our love deep enough to lead us towards a life together, leads to a perfect loyalty? How can we be sure that our love is mature enough to be bound and the promise of marriage vows for a life together until death do us part?
Want to feel true love together, giving, extending his hand. True love thinking about the other party, rather than thinking about themselves. If you read something, have you ever thought, I want to share this with my best friend? If you are planning something, are there you just think about what you want to do, or what will please the other side? As Herman Oeser, a German writer once said, "Those who want to be happy yourself, do not marry. Because of the importance of marriage is to make the other party happy. Those who want to understand the other hand, is not married. Because the important thing here is to understand their partner.
"The first litmus test is:
"What we could both feel something? Do I want to be happy or make others happy party? "
Second, Strength Test.
I once received a letter from a man who falls in love, but his heart was troubled. He had read somewhere that a person weight will be reduced if people really fall in love.
Although he himself devoted all her love, she did not lose weight and this is bothering him. It is true, that the experience of love that could also affect the physical condition. But in the long run true love will not eliminate your power; even contrary will give new strength and energy to you. Love will fill you with joy and makes you creative, and want to produce more.
The second test case:
"Is the love we give new strength and fills us with energy kreaktif, or even eliminate our love and strength of our energy?"
Third, Exam Award.
True love means also uphold the other side. A girl could admire a bachelor, when he saw him play football and score lots of goals. But if he asked himself, "if I wanted her as the father of my children?", He said often to be negative. A young man may admire a girl, she saw being danced. But when he asked himself, "if I wanted her as the mother of my children?", The girl was likely to change in his views.
The question is:
"Do we really have a high respect to each other? What I'm proud of my partner? "
Fourth, customs examination.
On the day when a European girl who was engaged to come to me. He was very worried, "I really love my fiance," she said, "but I can not stand the way she was eating an apple." Thoughtful laughter filled the room. "Love to accept other people along with his habit. Do not get married according to understand installments, then thought that the habits that will change at a later date. Most likely it will not happen. You must accept your partner as it is with all the habits and shortcomings.
Question:
"Are we just love each other or like each other too?"
Fifth, test altercation.
When a young couple coming couple say they want to get married, I always ask them, if they ever really occasional fight - not just a small difference of opinion, but really like a war. Often they replied, "Ah, never, we love each other." I told them, "Bertengkarlah first - before you get married." The problem of course, not fighting, but the ability to reconcile each other again. This capability should be trained and tested before marriage. Not sex, but the touchstone is pertengkaranlah experience "needed" before marriage.
Question:
"Can we forgive each other and gave each other?"
Sixth, Trials Left.
A young couple came to me. I asked "How long you love each other?" Ask me. "It's been three, almost four weeks," they replied. This is too short. I think so-so at least one year. Two years is better. It's good to meet each other, not just on holidays or the day of the week by dressing neatly, but also at work in everyday life, time has not neat, or shaving, still wearing T-shirts, not to wash my face, the hair is still tousled, in an atmosphere of tense or dangerous. There is an old saying, "Do not marry before having summer and winter together with your partner." If you're in doubt about the feelings of love, the time will give certainty.
Ask:
"What we love has passed the summer and winter? It's long enough we know each other? "
And let me give an obvious conclusion. Sex is not the touchstone for love. If a pair of young couple wants to have sexual relations to find out if they loved each other, to ask them, "So little love you?" If both of them thinking, "Tonight we should have sex - if not my partner will think that I did not love him or that he does not love me, "the fear of the possibility of failure is enough to banish the success of the experiment. Sex is not a litmus test for love, for sex will disappear when tested. Try the observation of self-invented itself in time brother sister went to bed. Civil observe yourself, and then could not sleep. Or you sleep, and then no longer able to observe yourself. Was the case with the same sex as a litmus test for love. Brother test, after that no longer want to love. Or you love, then do not test. For the sake of love itself, love needs to rein himself in bodily states to be incorporated into the dynamics of marriage triangle.